USF Libraries
USF Digital Collections

Ashes from falling stars

MISSING IMAGE

Material Information

Title:
Ashes from falling stars
Physical Description:
Book
Language:
English
Creator:
Nieves, John A
Publisher:
University of South Florida
Place of Publication:
Tampa, Fla
Publication Date:

Subjects

Subjects / Keywords:
Poetry
Free verse
Narrative
Lyric
Post-modern
Dissertations, Academic -- English -- Masters -- USF
Genre:
bibliography   ( marcgt )
theses   ( marcgt )
fiction   ( marcgt )

Notes

Abstract:
ABSTRACT: This thesis is a book length collection of poetry---all original and by the author. The book has three chapters, each with a different mode of expressing the work's overall theme: the remnants of unfulfilled wishes. The first chapter deals with ordinary or mundane manifestations of the theme. The second chapter covers extraordinary, but still feasible, variations on the theme. The final chapter deals with subconscious versions of these unfulfilled wishes. It is far more surreal than the other two chapters and exists in a sort of dream-reality. The poetry included in this work is all free verse. There are narrative and lyric poems present, along with other experimental modes of poetry. Even though plot threads run through some individual poems, the overall collection shares only thematic unity. The work, as the title implies, seeks to call attention the fragmentation of dead dreams after hope has burned away. In a sense then, this collection could be seen as a post-modern work. The poems are arranged within the chapters to either create groupings around mini-themes, or to create sharp contrast. The order represented in this collection is an attempt to maximize impact. The cast of characters in this collection of poems is meant to be representative of the characters present in city life. There are drunks and prostitutes, mothers and fathers, lovers and ex-lovers, husbands and wives, sisters and brothers, schoolchildren, writers, grandparents, lawyers, politicians, photographers, gamblers and even corpses. These characters populate a world where unanswered wishes are as legitimate as minutes and hours as instruments to gauge the passing of lives---a poetic rendering of Earth at the beginning of the twenty-first century.
Thesis:
Thesis (M.A.)--University of South Florida, 2006.
Bibliography:
Includes bibliographical references.
System Details:
System requirements: World Wide Web browser and PDF reader.
System Details:
Mode of access: World Wide Web.
Statement of Responsibility:
by John A. Nieves.
General Note:
Title from PDF of title page.
General Note:
Document formatted into pages; contains 72 pages.

Record Information

Source Institution:
University of South Florida Library
Holding Location:
University of South Florida
Rights Management:
All applicable rights reserved by the source institution and holding location.
Resource Identifier:
aleph - 001789653
oclc - 138359359
usfldc doi - E14-SFE0001463
usfldc handle - e14.1463
System ID:
SFS0025782:00001


This item is only available as the following downloads:


Full Text

PAGE 1

A s he s f r om F a l l i ng S t a r s by J ohn A N i e ve s A t he s i s s ubm i t t e d i n pa r t i a l f ul f i l l m e nt of t he r e qui r e m e nt s f or t he de g r e e of M a s t e r s of A r t s D e pa r t m e nt of E ngl i s h C ol l e ge of A r t s a nd S c i e nc e s U ni ve r s i t y of S ou t h F l o r i da M a j or P r of e s s or : N i c hol a s S a m a r a s P h. D R i t a C i r e s i M F A L a ur a R unge G or don P h D D a t e of A ppr ova l : M a r c h 31, 2006 K e yw or ds : poe t r y, f r e e ve r s e na r r a t i ve l y r i c pos t m ode r n C opyr i ght 2006 J ohn A N i e ve s

PAGE 2

T a bl e of C ont e nt s A bs t r a c t i i i C ha pt e r O ne : T he P a l a c e of W a nde r i ng A r t i f a c t s 1 T he A l a r m C l oc k T r a ns l a t e d 2 B a c kya r d 3 C ooki ng O ni ons 4 A c r os s T a bl e s 5 S i l ve r 6 D e l i ve r a nc e 7 N e w M oon 8 D a w n 9 I n t he W a ke of t he M or ni ng 10 B l a c ko ut a nd C ondol e nc e s 11 Y ou H a ve R e a c he d t he V oi c e M a i l box f o r . 12 L i ne a r A 13 S t a l e m a t e 14 N e w W or ds f o r O l d D e s i r e s 15 D r yi ng a R os e 16 S t i l l L i f e w i t h D r ow ni ng M a n 17 L ondon, Z one T h r e e 18 A bove t he T r e e L i ne 19 M ul c h S ong 20 N o N e w H a ve n 21 F i e l d T r i p: R e ddi ng, C onne c t i c ut 22 G ol d, S t one W ood a nd G l a s s 23 C ha pt e r T w o: P e e l i ng T i nt f r om B r oke n W i ndow s 24 R e d A l l O ve r 25 B a c ks t i t c h 26 L e s s T ha n M or ni ng 27 W i ndbr e a ke r 28 S ync opa t e d 29 F i r s t D a y i n S t L oui s 30 N a t i ona l A nt he m 31 C l i f f s N ot e s on t he S t a t e of t he U ni on A ddr e s s 32 A nd t o t he R e publ i c f o r W hi c h I t S t a nds 33 F a l l out P hot ogr a phe r 34 C ul de S a c 35 W e l l A f t e r S uns e t 36 i

PAGE 3

T he L a s t H i e r ogl yph 37 S t a i ne d G l a s s W i ndow 38 S c r a p I r on f or t he S c r a pbook 39 W i de E ye d A m ba s s a dor Z e r o 40 O bi t ua r y o f a n A ub r e y 41 A D r i nk be f or e B e dt i m e 42 E l e gy f or a M a n I N e ve r M e t 43 G r e e nbr i e r R oa d 44 N a r r a t i ve D i s t a nc e 45 T w o C a r G a r a ge 46 T he B ot t om D r a w e r 47 C ha pt e r T hr e e : I n V i ol e nt L i ght 48 I S a w Y ou W a t c h M e C r os s t he S t r e e t f r om Y o ur L i v i ng R oom 49 L ow T i de i n t he E ye of t he S t or m 50 S t r e ngt h R e pl i e d 51 A bs i nt he 52 O ne F ul l R ot a t i on 53 S oot hs a ye r 54 A c qui r i ng M yt hol ogy 55 L e a ve t he P e a r l i n t he O ys t e r 56 T r a i n of O ught s 57 M i dni ght i n t he Q ua r t e r 58 G ui de d by V oi c e s 59 T he C of f e e R e m a i ns A nonym ous 60 T he O ne L e a ni ng O ve r a B ook 61 I W a t c he d Y ou f r om t he D oo r w a y 62 T w o Y e a r s A go T hi s M or ni ng 63 P a l i m ps e s t 64 M e di t a t i on i n F r a gm e nt s 66 S m oke S i gna l s t o a P oe t ( a F r i e nd) 67 I nc i de nt a l M us i c 68 T w i l i ght S e r e na de 70 G ui de d M e di t a t i on 71 W ha t W a s L e f t 72 i i

PAGE 4

A s he s f r om F a l l i ng S t a r s J ohn A N i e ve s A B S T R A C T T hi s t he s i s i s a book l e ngt h c ol l e c t i on o f poe t r y a l l or i gi na l a nd by t he a ut hor T he book ha s t h r e e c ha pt e r s e a c h w i t h a di f f e r e nt m ode of e xpr e s s i ng t he w o r k s ove r a l l t he m e : t he r e m na nt s of unf ul f i l l e d w i s he s T he f i r s t c ha pt e r de a l s w i t h o r di na r y or m unda ne m a ni f e s t a t i ons of t he t he m e T he s e c ond c ha pt e r c ove r s e xt r a or di na r y but s t i l l f e a s i bl e va r i a t i ons on t he t he m e T he f i na l c ha pt e r de a l s w i t h s ubc ons c i ous ve r s i ons of t he s e unf ul f i l l e d w i s he s I t i s f a r m o r e s ur r e a l t ha n t he ot he r t w o c ha pt e r s a nd e xi s t s i n a s or t of d r e a m r e a l i t y T he poe t r y i nc l ude d i n t hi s w or k i s a l l f r e e ve r s e T he r e a r e na r r a t i ve a nd l yr i c poe m s pr e s e nt a l ong w i t h ot he r e xpe r i m e nt a l m od e s of poe t r y. E ve n t hough p l ot t h r e a ds r un t hr ough s om e i ndi vi dua l poe m s t he ove r a l l c ol l e c t i on s ha r e s onl y t he m a t i c uni t y T he w or k, a s t he t i t l e i m pl i e s s e e ks t o c a l l a t t e nt i on t he f r a gm e nt a t i on of de a d dr e a m s a f t e r hope ha s bur ne d a w a y. I n a s e ns e t he n, t hi s c ol l e c t i on c oul d be s e e n a s a pos t m ode r n w or k. T he poe m s a r e a r r a nge d w i t hi n t he c ha pt e r s t o e i t he r c r e a t e gr oupi ngs a r ound m i ni t he m e s or t o c r e a t e s ha r p c ont r a s t T he or de r r e pr e s e nt e d i n t hi s c ol l e c t i on i s a n a t t e m pt t o m a xi m i z e i m pa c t T he c a s t of c ha r a c t e r s i n t hi s c ol l e c t i on of poe m s i s m e a nt t o be r e pr e s e nt a t i ve of t he c ha r a c t e r s pr e s e nt i n c i t y l i f e T he r e a r e d r unks a nd pr os t i t ut e s m ot he r s a nd f a t he r s l ove r s a nd e x l ove r s hus ba nds a nd w i ve s s i s t e r s a nd br ot he r s s c hool c hi l dr e n, w r i t e r s gr a ndpa r e nt s l a w ye r s pol i t i c i a ns phot og r a phe r s g a m bl e r s a nd e ve n c or ps e s T he s e c ha r a c t e r s popul a t e a w or l d w he r e una ns w e r e d w i s he s a r e a s l e gi t i m a t e a s m i nut e s a nd hour s a s i ns t r um e nt s t o ga uge t he pa s s i ng of l i ve s a poe t i c r e nde r i ng of E a r t h a t t he be gi nni ng of t he t w e nt y f i r s t c e n t ur y i i i

PAGE 5

C ha pt e r O ne : T he P a l a c e of W a nde r i ng A r t i f a c t s 1

PAGE 6

T he A l a r m C l oc k T r a ns l a t e d I a m a l l you ha ve l e f t t o be l i e ve i n Y ou s t and w he n I m t a l ki ng t o you 2

PAGE 7

B a c kya r d A f t e r t he t r e e f e l l s i x hour s s l i d a w a y f r om you l i ke a s na ke i nt o t he br us h. Y ou s pe nt t he ni ght t e l l i ng t he s t um p you w e r e s or r y, but de c a pi t a t i on w a s ha r d t o f o r gi ve e ve n a l ovi ng c a r e s s l e f t on l y s pl i nt e r s T he ne xt m o r ni ng s un r a p e d your w i ndow s a nd t he s qui r r e l s pus he d up a gr a t e m ove d i nt o t he e a ve s of your hous e Y our c hi l dr e n c a l l e d you gi a nt k i l l e r a voi de d your e ye s l i ke t he y w e r e be dt i m e E ve n t he s a w dus t f l e w a w a y. A t dus k, you w e r e s t i l l s i t t i ng w i t h your ba c k a ga i ns t your vi c t i m t yi ng a nd unt yi ng your s hoe s w i pi ng your s w e a t w i t h bl ue pr i nt s T he da y ha d l e f t no ne w s ha dow no m e a l t o s a t e t he r a vi s he d s ky, no pool no pi c ni c t a bl e not h i ng t o s t op t he ni gh t f r om e a t i ng you a l i ve 3

PAGE 8

C ooki ng O ni on s S he s unc onc e r ne d w i t h t he di c i ng. T ha t c ha pt e r ha s c l os e d, a l l t e a r s s he d, a l l f i nge r s s oa ke d a nd s c e nt e d. N ow s he c a s t s he r oni ons i nt o t he pa n s i z z l i ng a nd poppi ng i n a t hi n l a ye r o f ol i ve oi l T he s c e nt f i l l s t he r oom O ut s i de a dog c he w s on a de a d l i z a r d, a c hi l d f a l l s o f f a s w i ng s e t a l e t t e r a r r i ve s i n a m a i l box a nd a hus ba nd r i ngs a doo r be l l t o s e r ve hi s w i f e di vor c e pa pe r s B ut i n he r e t he s pi t t l e of s i z z l i ng oi l t he l i t t l e bu r ns on he r ha nds t he di s c ol or a t i on a t t he bot t om of he r w oode n s poo n ke e p t hi ngs c a l m ke e p t hi ngs s a f e ke e p he r f r o m a ns w e r i ng t he door 4

PAGE 9

A c r os s T a bl e s Y ou di dn t ne e d s om e one t o t e l l you w he r e t o pr e s s your t ongue a ga i ns t a w om a n or how t o w r i t e a s ui c i de or how bi r ds ne ve r di e of ol d a ge a t l e a s t not i n publ i c B ut t hi s w a s i m por t a nt f or t hi s you ne e de d i ns t r uc t i on S o you e nl i s t e d a n ol d m a n w i t h de t e r m i ne d ha nds t o t e a c h you how t o pou r your S a m buc a s e l e c t a l e a de r s hoot t he l i quor but w a i t . hol d i t . s w i s h a s l ong a s t he l e a de r doe s now ga r gl e w i t h hi m t he n s w a l l ow a nd br e a t he i n t hr ough your f i nge r s T hi s w a s your r i t ua l : how you d c ons e c r a t e your f r i e nds ne got i a t e a n unde r s t a ndi ng of c a m a r a de r i e t hr ough a ba c kw a r ds w hi s t l e a nd m a ke t he m pr o m i s e t o t e a c h t hi s a s you pr om i s e d your gr a ndf a t he r a s I pr om i s e d you 5

PAGE 10

S i l ve r Y our ha nd pr e s s e d t he gl a s s your pa l m h i di ng he r pa l m Y our e ye s a voi di ng he r s f i nd t he a s ht r a y ove r f l ow i ng ont o t he c ount e r I l ove you but I don t t r u s t you. Y ou r e a l r e a dy l a t e f or w or k a nd you ha ve gi ve n up t he s e a r c h f o r t he c a r ke ys T he m i ni bo t t l e of J i m B e a m i n your l e f t ha nd i s a l m os t e m pt y. I l ove you but I don t t r us t you. Y ou bot h pul l your ha nds a w a y you t hr ow you r l i ps t i c k i t s t r i ke s i t s e l f f a l l s i nt o t he s i nk. Y ou t ur n o f f t he ba t hr oom l i ght f um bl e f o r t he doo r knob e a ge r ur ge nt know i ng t ha t onc e you r e a c h t he ha l l w a y you w i l l be a l one 6

PAGE 11

D e l i ve r a nc e I pa s s e d a c hi l d i n dow nt ow n A l buque r que H i s s oi l da r k e ye s m e t m i ne H e s a i d, E xc us e m e M i s t e r W oul d you l i ke t o s e e t he r oa d t o H e a ve n? I nt r i gue d I nodde d. H e l e d m e a f e w bl oc ks s out h t o a di r t y s t r e e t T hi s i s m y c a t J e nny, a nd t hi s i s m y dog W oo f a nd t hi s i s m y ot he r dog P uppy a nd he r ba by, C hoc ol a t e W hi l e he w a s s pe a ki ng, he w a s poi nt i ng a t s t a i ns on t he pa ve m e nt A nd t hi s i s how t he y go t t o H e a ve n. 7

PAGE 12

N e w M oon I n t he m i ddl e of t w e l ve c a ndl e s on a m a t m a de of p i l l ow c a s e s you s a t e ye s c l os e d, f a c e poi nt e d t o t he s t a r s Y our br e a t h w a s s l ow a nd d i s t a nt but your ha i r da nc e d on your c he e k. Y ou a s ke d m e t o be s i l e nt s o you c oul d c onc e nt r a t e on n i ght t i m e w hi l e t he l i t t l e w i c ks f l i c ke r e d ne a r your t oe s I t r i e d t o s w a l l ow m y br e a t h, ke e p m ys e l f f r om m ovi ng but t he w i nd c a m e a nd s a ng t he c a ndl e s t o s l e e p. T he n i n t he ne w da r kne s s you di ppe d your f i nge r i nt o w a r m w a x t ouc he d m i ne l e t i t ha r de n be t w e e n us W e ga t he r e d up t he c a ndl e s I bl us he d a nd bow e d m y he a d. T he r e w a s a m om e nt t ha t w i t h f ul l a r m s you m a na ge d t o e m br a c e m e T he n w e s l i d a l ong t he gr a s s t o t he ba c k door t o t he ha l l w a y, pur e b l a c kne s s O nc e i ns i de you hi t t he l i ght a nd t ur ne d of f t he ni ght 8

PAGE 13

D a w n S unr i s e S om e S unda y. N e va da s kyl i ne Y ou w a t c h d us t pi r oue t t e ne a r a r us t e d s t op s i gn. Y ou s m oke t he e nd of your c i ga r e t t e a nd a l i t t l e of t he f i l t e r t r a c e your i ni t i a l s i nt o t he s a nd, e nc i r c l e t he m ( Y ou d s pe nt t he ni ght l e a vi ng or pha n ki s s e s on a s l i de s how of f a c e s dr i pp i ng m a s c a r a on i c e w hi t e s he e t s l e t t i ng s t e a m s i ng l ul l a bi e s t o s que a ky box s pr i ngs ) a nd t he s unl i ght s pi l l s l i ke w hi t e w i ne a c r os s your c he e ks 9

PAGE 14

I n t he W a ke o f t he M or n i ng C r yi ng a t t he bo t t om o f a s t a i r w e l l a l i t t l e gi r l S he s t ood f a c i ng a w a l l m a r oon a nd c r a c ke d. H e r f or e he a d pr e s s e d a ga i ns t t he ol d pa i nt I w a l ke d dow n t o he r f r om m y a pa r t m e nt : W ha t s w r ong? I ki l l e d i t I s t e ppe d on i t I l ooke d dow n a t t he de s i c c a t e d r e m a i ns of a l i z a r d j us t a f e w i nc he s f r o m t he bo t t om s t e p. Y ou di dn t ki l l t ha t l i z a r d. I t s a l l d r i e d out be e n de a d f or da ys N o no S he k i c ke d a t t he t r a s h on t he gr ound M i s t e r I s t e ppe d on i t D on t c r y. Y ou di dn t hu r t i t B ut i t w a s a l i ve be f or e T he r e w a s no a r gui ng t ha t W i t hou t a s hr e d o f di gni t y t he dr i e d out l i z a r d, ha l f i nt e r r e d unde r gum w r a ppe r s a nd c i ga r e t t e but t s a t l e a s t ha d t hi s w a ke t he t w o of us t o m our n i t s pa s s i ng. I pa t t e d t he gi r l on t he s houl de r he a de d ba c k up t he s t a i r s E ve r yt hi ng w a s i n or de r 10

PAGE 15

B l a c ko ut a nd C ondol e nc e s T he c a ndl e s s i c k f r om t he i r ow n w a x ha ng t he m s e l ve s of f t he e nd of t he i r s t i c ks W or ds br e a k on ye l l ow pa pe r I t r y t o f o r c e out t hi s l e t t e r but no m a t t e r how ha r d I pus h t he w a ve s ke e p r ol l i ng ba c k. T he r e w a s s om e t hi n g i m por t a nt t he ki s s of a m o m e nt t ha t I w a nt e d t o s e nd ove r t he s e a t o w a r m you i n t he s now of be i ng a l on e but m y i nk j us t w on t r e a c h. I w a nt t o m a i l you m y f i nge r s t o m a s s a ge your m u s c l e s I know your ne c k s om e t i m e s t ur ns on your he a d, a nd t hos e c r a m ps w on t l e t you s l e e p. I w i s h I c oul d ge t m y e ye s t o your be d r oom T he y d w i nk, s m i l e a nd e m pa t hi z e T he n t he r i gor s of c opi ng w i t h f r e s h e a r t h a nd t om bs t one s w oul d s l i p a w a y l i ke ni ght m a r e s w he n t he s un ki s s e s t he m goodbye Y our f a m i l y pl ot t hi c ke ns ; d on t l e t i t unr a ve l you I l ong t o gi ve you t he s e w or ds t o r e t i e B ut he r e w i t h no pow e r a nd i ns uf f i c i e nt p os t a ge t he da r k i s t hum bi ng a r i de on m y s c r a t c he s m y pa ge s I l l buy a s t a m p t o m or r ow t he n c a l l t o a pol ogi z e 11

PAGE 16

Y ou H a v e R e a c he d t he V oi c e M a i l box f or . A t 8 p m I l e f t you a m e s s a ge T he n a s pi de r pa r a c hut e d f r om t he c e i l i ng l a nde d on m y phone be ga n f r a nt i c a l l y w e a vi ng, l a c i ng hi s pa s t e ove r t he he a ds e t a nc hor i ng i t t o t he t ouc h t one s I w a t c he d hi m f or a n hour T he n i t s t r uc k m e H e kne w you w e r e n t c a l l i ng ba c k. 12

PAGE 17

L i ne a r A T oni ght I m a f r e e l a nc e phot ogr a phe r w a t c hi ng t he ni ght un r ol l l i ke gi f t w r a p a c r os s a c i t y of s kyl e s s s t a r s I m a de s e r t e r l e a vi ng t he w a r o f s i l e nc e t o t i r e d g r a s s t o s i de w a l ks A c a nni ba l e a t i ng t he i n t e l l e c t of t hos e a r ound m e s i ngi ng t he ol d s ha m a n s s ong: w hat I i nge s t be c om e s m y ow n. A n a m a t e ur l i ngui s t ke yboa r d f ul l of f r a nt i c d i gi t s de s pe r a t e l y t r yi ng t o t r a ns l a t e t he i r ow n f i nge r pr i nt s 13

PAGE 18

S t a l e m a t e Y ou w i l l ke e p i t t i e d ne a t l y a nd t uc ke d i n a c o r ne r a pa c ke d ba g ne ve r m e a nt t o c om e hom e but I w i l l c a l l t o i t a nyw a y a nd you w i l l a ns w e r f or i t : M a ybe t om or r ow O K ? but t om or r ow s j us t a s uf f i x i m pos s i bl e t o r e a c h be c a us e w e c a n t ge t pa s t t oda y. Y ou w i l l l e a ve you r pa s s i on t o t he dus t t o r ot a nd r us t a nd r e e k a nd I w i l l s i ng t o t r y t o r e s t a r t i t s he a r t but e ve nt ua l l y a c l e a r r i ngi ng not e w i l l s ha t t e r i t a nd t he n hope w i l l be i n a dus t pa n t he n a ga r ba ge c a n t he n a l a ndf i l l but you w i l l s t i l l be he r e t a l ki ng a bout ye s t e r da y. I t s j us t a p r e f i x I t w i l l a l w a ys be t oda y. 14

PAGE 19

N e w W or ds f or O l d D e s i r e s f or J ohn K S a m s on, f ol ks i nge r W e bot h w hi s pe r t he s a m e i nnoc e nt obs c e ni t i e s t he a w kw a r d m om e nt w he n e ye s m e e t a f t e r s om e t hi ng unt ouc he d be c om e s t ouc he d. W e s e nd s c a r s a s s ym pa t hy c a r ds be a t i ng bodi e s f or t he i r ow n pl e a s ur e f or t he i r ow n good W e f i nd our f l a t pl a c e s your s pr a i r i e m i ne s w a m p, bot h c ove r e d i n s t one s t ha t m a r k ou r ol d m i s t a ke s W i t h i nk a nd t ongue s w e r a i s e t he m f l i ng t he m a t t he e ye s a nd e a r s o f bys t a nde r s t he n l ook gr a c i ous l y, l i ke t he r e s houl d be m ode s t a ppl a us e l i ke our qu i e t a nd r e ve a l i ng t r e a c he r i e s s houl d be p r a i s e d l i ke s ol di e r s f or dyi ng w e l l or c onvi c t s f or t a ki ng t he i r m e di c i ne 15

PAGE 20

D r yi ng a R os e A n e m pt y c a n. A puddl e o f be e r s e e pi ng i nt o f a de d bl ue c a r pe t A s pe nt book of m a t c he s pe r c he d a ga i ns t a l e a t he r bound phot o a l bum O l d s ne a ke r s i n t he t oi l e t U nus e d c ondom s t os s e d i nt o a w a s t e pa pe r ba s ke t A c ut f l ow e r ha ngi ng ups i de dow n f r om t he m i ni b l i nds e xha l i ng t he m oi s t ur e o f a t hous a nd ki s s e s l os i ng t he r e d o f bl us he d c he e ks be c om i ng br i t t l e a nd i m m or t a l pr e c i ous a nd de l i c a t e but s t i l l de a d. 16

PAGE 21

S t i l l L i f e w i t h D r ow ni ng M a n N ot s o m uc h s t a ndi ng, a s f a l l i ng ve r y s l ow l y you m i ght r e a c h t he f l oor by l a s t c a l l Y ou ve dr ool e d e nough t o put out your c i ga r e t t e but you r e s t i l l pi nc hi ng i t t a ppi ng i m a gi na r y a s h. O ne s a nda l of f your ba r e t oe s c l e nc h a t t he ba r s b r a s s f oot r a i l T he one s t i l l s a nda l e d, a pi l l a r i n a pi l e of pe a nut s he l l s your onl y s a f e gua r d a ga i ns t t he gr ound O n t he ba r you ve l a i d a pi c t ur e f a c e dow n, but you s t i l l s t a r e your e ye s m a na c l e d t o i t Y our nos e dr i ppi ng t he ba r t e nde r s ba c k t u r ne d, t hr e e s hot s of s c ot c h on t he c ount e r 17

PAGE 22

L ondon, Z one T hr e e S i nk qui e t l y t he s un ha s f or gi ve n w ha t i t c a n, a nd t he s m og f r om t he G r e a t E a s t e r n L i ne r e s ponds by r i s i ng unc ont e s t e d ove r W a s hi ngt on S t r e e t A doubl e de c ke r bus s t ops on t he c or ne r P e opl e bl e e d out e a c h i n a di f f e r e nt c a pi l l a r y s ur gi ng t ow a r d t he ke ba bi s h, t he o f f l i c e ns e or ba c k t o t he i r f l a t s T he f r on t pa ge o f a ne w s pa pe r w a f t s i n t he b r e e z e t he he a dl i ne : P e t r ol S t r i ke I m pe ndi ng! a bi r t hm a r k on i t s be l l y a s i t m i gr a t e s t ow a r d I l f o r d T he c a r s of M a nor P a r k l i ne t he s t r e e t s l i ke t om bs t one s t he e m bl e m s of t hi s l a nd of a na c hr oni s m s O ut of ha bi t t he y l i ne up w i t h o l d hi t c hi ng pos t s M y gi r l f r i e nd s que e z e s m y a r m a nd s que a ks C a n you be l i e ve t he D i s t r i c t L i ne ha s a s t op unde r H a dr i a n s W a l l ? T w o t hous a nd ye a r s i n a w hi s pe r 18

PAGE 23

A bove t he T r e e L i ne O n a m ount a i n t oo s t e e p f or s ound, w e s a t f e e t da ngl i ng of f t he e dge of a l ookout r oc k da w n c om i ng but t he w i nd s t i l l a s l e e p, a nd t he c ol d a s s t i l l a s w e w e r e S i l e nc e M y ha nd de l i c a t e l y on your s s i l e nc e l i ke m oonl i ght on gl a s s T he n t he y c a m e l i ke r a ve nous gna t s : t hought s I r e a l i z e d t ha t our s a nc t ua r y w a s s om e one e l s e s j um pi ng of f pl a c e s om e one e l s e s pr i s on T he n I t hought o f m y ow n how t he t i m e c l oc k s ounde d l i ke a gu i l l ot i ne dr oppi ng on a ne w vi c t i m e a c h m i nut e H ow f a c e s of t he de a d s e e m s t r e t c he d a nd br ui s e d a nd t um bl e d ove r a nd ove r l i ke t he w he e l s of a t r uc k ba r r e l i ng dow n t he hi ghw a y w i t h t he f o r c e of a t hous a nd a ngr y m a r c hi ng ba nds I c e s t a r e d a t m e f r om t he c l i f f f a c e I t m a de no c om m e nt I l ooke d a t you, a s ha m e d, t he ne w e s t vi c t i m of t he onl y t hi ng t ha t c a n r ui n t he qui e t of a pl a c e w i t hout i nt e r r upt i ng t he s i l e nc e : t hought 19

PAGE 24

M ul c h S ong I w a s a t r e e onc e t a l l a nd di gni f i e d ( w e l l i f not di gni f i e d, a t l e a s t s t a t e l y) m e a nt t o be c l i m be d not w a l ke d on. I w a s a t r e e onc e t he w or l d s l ungs a nd s he l t e r N ow I a m r e duc e d t o r oa d s i de r e f us e s om e t hi ng t ha t ge t s w e dge d i n pa s s i ng s a nda l s I w a s a t r e e onc e a hom e f or bi r d a nd bug opos s um a nd s qui r r e l not pl a s t i c ba gs a nd s oda c a ns W e w e r e a l l t r e e s onc e r e a c hi ng t o t he s ky w i t h c l e a r pur pos e a nd de t e r m i na t i on, be f or e w e w e r e t or n dow n pr oc e s s e d, c om m i t t e d t o t he e a r t h. W e w e r e a l l t r e e s onc e be f or e our r oot s di e d 20

PAGE 25

N o N e w H a ve n L i m pi ng a l ong i vy a nd br i c k, one m or e de c r e pi t s unr i s e ove r N e w H a ve n. T hi s t i m e i t l ooks l i ke i t m i ght f ol d qui t a t t w i l i g ht s i nk ba c k t o s l e e p a t t he f i r s t oppor t uni t y A s i c k l i t t l e m i s t e ngul f s t hi s be nc h, t hr e a ds i t s e l f be t w e e n us he m m i ng us a s i f t w o w e r e t oo m uc h one of us w a s e xt r a ne ous A s ha dow s l i de s a c r os s your f a c e t he c l ouds a r e c om i ng. A n ow l s om e w he r e i n t he e a ve s of t he P e a body M us e um be a t s t he s i l e n c e ba c k a t r e gul a r i nt e r va l s I s qui nt M y e ye s f r os t i ng ove r t r y t o f oc us a s t he f og e r a s e s you. 21

PAGE 26

F i e l d T r i p: R e ddi ng, C onne c t i c ut A pi l e of de a d a ut um n l e a ve s s hi f t i ng s ha de s a nd i nc l i na t i ons ol d a nd c r a c ke d: t he t om bs t one s of R e ddi ng C e m e t e r y. I t r udge d s i ngl e f i l e w i t h t he ot he r c hi l dr e n, a c r os s m oi s t gr ound, c a r r yi ng a g r a ve r ubbi ng pa d, m or e t ha n ha l f m y s i z e a nd a s m a l l s t i c k of c ha r c oa l T he i ns c r i pt i ons on t he s t one s hi dde n by br a c ke n a nd c e nt ur i e s o f w i nd a n d r a i n I c hos e a s m a l l gr a y w hi t e s t one s pl ot c he d w i t h oc hr e I pr e s s e d m y pa d t o i t s f a c e i t m a de no c om m e nt T he n I r ubbe d m y c ha r c oa l a c r os s t he pa ge t he w a y m y t e a c he r ha d s how n us B e f or e m y e ye s t he l e t t e r s a ppe a r e d a s e m pt i ne s s i n a s e a of g r a y s m udge : a na m e a nd da t e s t ha t I c a n no l onge r r e m e m be r B ut i t l e f t t hi s a n i m p r e s s i on t ha t s t i l l c l i ngs t o m e : how de a t h a ppe a r s s udde nl y, out of no t hi ngne s s s ha r i ng a s t or y c om pos e d of w o r ds t ha t l oom hu ge i n m y e ye s but a r e not w r i t t e n i n m y ha nd 22

PAGE 27

G ol d, S t one W ood a nd G l a s s Y our ha nds m oonl i gh t on a r a i n r i ppl e d pond w r ot e e s s a ys i n gol d. Y ou, a l w a ys c onc e r ne d w i t h i m pa c t w i t h gr a c e A s t one s e t i n a m e m o r y c r e a t e d a n he i r l oom f or a s t r a nge r s f a m i l y, a nd s om e c hi l d w i l l s a y: T hi s i s m y gr a ndf a t he r s r i ng, but t hi s i s m y gr a ndf a t he r s r i ng Y our ha nds a l w a ys ol de r t ha n t he m a n, c ut w ood l i ke a pe e r o f t he t r e e t ha t s he d i t Y ou bui l t a pl a yhous e put a l oc k on a gl a s s door F or pr i va c y, you s a i d. Y ou, on t he por c h a r m s f ol de d, s m i l i ng. W e l oc ke d t he door you w a ve d t o us a nd w e nt i ns i de Y our ha nds s huf f l e d dom i nos on a c a r d t a bl e s e r ve d us pl a nt a nos c r e a t e d he i r l oom s f or our f a m i l y out of go l d a nd s t one out of w ood a nd gl a s s out of n e c e s s i t y. 23

PAGE 28

C ha pt e r T w o: P e e l i ng T i nt f r o m B r oke n W i ndow s 24

PAGE 29

R e d A l l O ve r N e w s pa pe r L oc a l S e c t i on. P a ge T hr e e T he pol i c e br i e f s I d s e e your na m e t he r e onc e i n a w hi l e A r r e s t e d f or r a c ke t e e r i ng or a s s a ul t i l l e ga l ga m bl i ng o r pe t t y t he f t I r e m e m be r one T hur s da y; a s s a ul t w a s t he f l a vor o f t he w e e k. T he y r a n you r pi c t u r e f i r s t t i m e I s a w you r f a c e a nyw he r e but m y d r e a m s Y ou w e r e a s c r a w ny t hi ng w i t h t i s s ue pa pe r s ki n a nd a pi pe c l e a ne r ne c k N ot a t a l l w ha t I pi c t ur e d w he n I he a r d M ot he r t e l l t ha t s t or y: H ow you bus t e d i n a t t w o A M r um dr i ppi ng f r o m your c hi n s om e w hor e i n he r unde r w e a r ki s s i ng you on t he c he e k, s a yi ng, W ho s t ha t B i g B e n? G r a ndm a s t i l l you ng, i n t he ki t c he n w i t h s ha t t e r e d e ye s a ns w e r i ng, H i s w i f e l a s t t i m e I c he c ke d! Y ou de c or a t i ng he r c he e kbone w i t h a f r yi ng pa n, a nd t a ki ng a l l t he m one y i n t he hous e A l i t t l e gi r l a bout ni ne c om i ng out o f he r r oom i n pi nk pa j a m a s s t r uggl i ng t o ope n he r e ye s s a w M om m y hol di ng he r f a c e bl ood s t r e a m i ng be t w e e n he r f i nge r s T ur ne d t o you, D a ddy, D a ddy! C a l l t he hos pi t a l M om m y s bl e e di ng! T he l i t t l e gi r l r unni ng up t o you w i t h he r a r m s ope n. Y ou s hovi ng he r a ga i ns t t he w a l l r e d f r om t he ba c k of he r he a d r unni ng dow n t he pa i nt H e r s c r e a m i ng a nd you w a l ki ng out your w hor e s l a m m i ng t he door I t hought you d be s e ve n f e e t t a l l m a de of s t e e l a nd b r e a t hi ng f i r e S o, I r e c yc l e d you F i ve ye a r s now s t i l l ha ve n t s e e n a not he r pi c t ur e but I ke e p r e a di ng, you ke e p t u r ni ng m y f i nge r s bl a c k, a nd onc e a ye a r t he pa pe r boy d r ops you i n a ba g a t m y door s t e p. 25

PAGE 30

B a c ks t i t c h S i ngi ng on a l a w n c ha i r you f i nge r e d you r be e r t o k i l l t he f oa m Y our s hoe s s l um pe d be f or e you ki c ke d of f l i ke va ga bonds f r om a s t or e f r ont Y our voi c e s hook out of t he a i r s now f r om a c oa t j us t r e m ove d A dog how l e d ne xt door Y ou t os s e d br e a d ove r t he f e nc e T he r e i n t he a l m os t l i ght of 3 A M s ubur bi a you bur i e d a n obi t ua r y r e nde r e d unr e a da bl e by t he s w e a t of you r pa l m Y our e ye s t hr e a dba r e t ur ne d t o t he e a r t h f or s om e t hi ng w hol e T he gr a s s pi e r c e d t he g r ound. D e j e c t e d, you l ooke d t o t he s ky. F ound onl y t h i s : S a gi t t a r i us l one l y a r r ow t he ni ght pe r f o r a t e d. 26

PAGE 31

L e s s T ha n M or ni ng Y ou a r e s c r a pi ng c a r bon f r om a ba ki ng t i n by a pl a t e o f bur ne d bi s c ui t s c ooke d t oo l ong, t oo l ow W he n you r e done yo u e a t t he t ops a nd l e a ve t he b a s e s j us t l i ke a l l t he c i ga r e t t e s you s m oke T he n you s l um p i nt o a c or ne r l i ke a c hi l d c r i ppl e d by hunge r c ha nt i ng O l d M a c D ona l d w i t h your ha nds ove r your e a r s I t ouc h you r s houl de r a s k you w ha t you r e doi ng. T he s ong c ha nge s but you don t s t op s i ngi ng: A nd on hi s f a r m t he r e w a s a c he c k f or e ve r y bi l l a nd on hi s f a r m a phone t ha t ha d s om e t hi ng t o s a y, a nd on hi s f a r m a door t ha t l e a d a nyw he r e but he r e a nd on hi s f a r m l e gs t ha t c oul d s t i l l s t a nd a nd w a l k a w a y. 27

PAGE 32

W i ndbr e a ke r Y ou w e r e ha ppi e r w he n t he w i nd w a s s t i l l i n you r e ye s be f or e you l e a r ne d t o s a c r i f i c e t he l i t t l e t hi ngs Y ou d s w e e p us a w a y w i t h a n a f t e r t hought a s hor t de l a y, a n a c i di c quot e you d r i ppe d f r om a pol i t i c a l r a g or publ i c r a di o. Y ou d s t a nd one ha nd on you r hi p one ha nd di r e c t i ng t r a f f i c f o r dr unke n e t he r e a l but t e r f l i e s i gni t i ng us w i t h your m or a l m a t c h your br i m s t one o f da i l y i nj us t i c e T he s m e l l w oul d l i nge r l ong a f t e r you ha d gone I s t i l l he a r i t i n pa s s i ng: s om e one w i l l hi t you r a ngr y f a l s e t t o c r a nk out a c r a c kl i ng a r i a of s oc i a l i ni qu i t y. B ut not you. Y ou a r e t oo i nt e nt on t he s c a l e s t o s e e t he m t i ppi n g, a nd t he c r e e pi ng s pi de r o f l a w ha s c a ught your a nge r i n i t s dus t y w e b s uc ke d i t dr y. N ow w he n you s c r e a m I obj e c t i t i s f ol l ow e d by Y our H onor i ns t e a d of t o t hi s bu l l s hi t Y our w i nd ha s br o ke n on s t a t ut e s a nd f oot not e s W he n w e s e e you, w e t r y t o s t i r you i nt o s t i r r i ng us i ns t e a d of your c of f e e w i t h your s l i c k bl a c k B i c 28

PAGE 33

S ync opa t e d I ve c a t a l ogue d your t ouc he s : t he ge nt l e t he a c c i de nt a l a nd t he one s t ha t m a de you r f i nge r s bl us h. A nd t he s i ghs you l e f t on m y door s t e ps da nc i ng l i ke f l a gs i n t he w i nd ha l f m a s t a nd hom e l e s s T he s pot w he r e you r e ye l i d m e e t s your f a c e : t he de s t i na t i on of ob l ong gl a nc e s a nd r e ne ga de t e a r s A nd how you d bl ow ki s s e s a t t he ba c k o f m y he a d, s a ve your s c or n f or m y c he e ks f or m y ha l f s m i l e A nd t he di m pl e i n t he m a t t r e s s ne a r t he he a dboa r d t ha t s t i l l s m e l l s l i ke you e ve n w i t h ne w s he e t s e ve n w i t h a ne w m a t t r e s s 29

PAGE 34

F i r s t D a y i n S t L ou i s M y f r i e nd, a na t i ve s a ys : T he r e w e r e t i m e s s o vi o l e nt t he M i s s i s s i ppi r a n r e d w i t h bl ood I r e p l y: W ha t doe s t ha t s a y a bout our ow n c hunk o f hi s t or y? U nl e s s I m ha l l uc i na t i ng, t he r i ve r i s b r ow n. 30

PAGE 35

N a t i ona l A nt he m Y ou w i l l a t t e m pt t o s e l l t he m t he bl un t s i de of t he kni f e s t ut t e r t hr ough t he r he t o r i c of s a c r i f i c e s t a c k t he c hi l dr e n on t he a l t a r s a y a pr a ye r t ha t t he i r b l ood t u r ns bl a c k a nd bu r ns dum p t he i r bodi e s i nt o pool s T he y c a n onl y r i ppl e ba c k a t you, a s you s m i l e a nd w a ve 31

PAGE 36

C l i f f s N ot e s on t he S t a t e o f t he U ni on A ddr e s s I a m I ow n m yt ho l ogy. I a m m y ow n m y t hol ogy. N ot e s : R e pe a t unt i l t he y be l i e ve m e S C R A T C H T H A T R e pe a t unt i l be l i e f i s i ne vi t a bl e N O N O N O S T I L L W R O N G R e pe a t unt i l t he y a r e s a yi ng i t f o r m e 32

PAGE 37

A nd t o t h e R e publ i c f or W hi c h I t S t a nds W a l ki ng t hr ough t he s t r e e t s of T a m pa w i t h a n a c qua i nt a nc e of m i ne w e c a m e t o a pe de s t r i a n t r a f f i c s i gna l B ot h t he w al k a nd don t w al k s ym bol s w e r e l i t I l a ughe d a nd t ur ne d t o poi nt i t out but m y f r i e nd ha d one uppe d m e R i gi d a nd s t r a i ght f a c e d, e ye s f i xe d on t he m a l f unc t i oni ng l i ght he s t ood, ha nd ove r he a r t s a yi ng t he P l e dge of A l l e gi a nc e H e f i ni s he d a nd t ur ne d t o m e F i r s t t i m e I m e a nt i t s i nc e t hi r d gr a de 33

PAGE 38

F a l l out P hot og r a phe r 1 A m i t t e n, ha l f e a t e n by f i r e s hi ni ng i t s c ha r c oa l s m i l e ont o t he bl a c k a nd c r a c ke d hus k of a c ouc h, a nd t he gui l t y l ooki ng s oot o f a n ove r t ur ne d a s ht r a y. 2 P hot ogr a phs H i s l i ve l i hood, hi s t r a de P i c t ur e s of c r i m e s c e ne s t r a f f i c a c c i de nt s a nd t he r e m n a nt s of hous e f i r e s H e s i ghs T he hor r or of s udde n vi ol e nc e i s i n i t s p r e c i s i on i t doe s e xa c t l y w ha t i s ne c e s s a r y t o c r e a t e t he s c e ne N ot hi ng m or e 3 H e t ur ns hi s c a m e r a ove r r e ve a l s a t i ny di s pl a y s c r e e n, on i t a n ove r t ur ne d pi c k up t r uc k unf i ni s he d ol i ve gr e e n, a n a r m dr e s s e d t o t he w r i s t i n pl a i d r e s t i ng a t a f or t y f i ve de gr e e a ngl e t o t he c onc r e t e 4 H e s m i r ks B r ut a l w or k? N ot r e a l l y. I t s ki nd o f pe a c e f ul P hys i c a l e vi de nc e by na t ur e i s s t i l l i s s i l e nt T he t e r r o r ha s a l r e a d y done i t s w or k l e f t e ve r yt hi ng or de r e d a nd a r r a nge d. I j us t t ouc h a but t on A nd e ve n t ha t i s noi s e l e s s now m y c a m e r a ha s be e n s i l e nc e d by pr og r e s s m y he a r t by c oi nc i de nc e 34

PAGE 39

C ul de S a c S he ki c ks t he w a l l S w e a t w a l ks t he pl a nk of he r f or e he a d, a ba ndons s hi p. Y ou s hi t Y ou i m pos s i bl e s hi t Y ou r u i ne d m y l i f e T he r oom s e nds he r voi c e ba c k a t he r i n a s pi t e f ul e c ho S he f i xe s he r e ye s on hi s a nd f oa m s a l i t t l e i n t he c or ne r s o f he r m out h. Y ou ba s t a r d! Y ou t ook e ve r yt hi ng f r om m e H e l ooks ba c k a t he r l i ke he m i ght c r y t he n he s m i l e s S he knoc ks a book o f f t he ni ght s t a nd. Y ou don t e ve n c a r e Y ou r ui ne d m e a nd you do n t e ve n c a r e T he t w o o f t he m f a l l s i l e nt e ye s l oc ke d i nt o e a c h ot he r s S he be gi ns t o s hi ve r a nd s ob. H e gi gg l e s H ope l e s s l y, l i ke a n a nc i e nt a nd l ong br oke n s l a ve S he hunc he s ove r a nd f a s t e ns hi s di a pe r 35

PAGE 40

W e l l A f t e r S uns e t D o t he s t a r s c ons pi r e t o pi n us dow n l i ke but t e r f l i e s ? B l a ke S c hw a r z e nba c h T he m oon r e nt t he s ky, l e a vi ng a ga s h of c ol d l i ght a be a c on, a ba t t l e a xe Y our e ye s s hi ve r e d. Y ou put a r e d m a r ke r t o your ha nd s c r a t c he d a n a r r ow I t w i l l ne ve r poi nt w e s t Y ou a ve r t e d your e ye s a s i f you c oul d f e e l t he t r e e s s t a r i ng you dow n, w hi s pe r i ng you i nt o s ubm i s s i on. I s i p pe d a be e r put m y f e e t up on a m os s y r oc k I t w i l l ne ve r poi nt w e s t Y ou w e r e bl us hi ng. T he a ngr y c oi l s of you r ha i r f e nde d of f a not he r ki dna ppi ng a t t e m pt by t he N o r t h W i nd. I t w i l l ne ve r poi nt w e s t Y ou he l d your a r m s out a t your s i de Y ou l ooke d m or e l i ke you w e r e dr ow ni ng t ha n f l yi ng, but t he s t a r s w e r e n t m ove d, a nd t he gr a s s r os e a ga i ns t you. 36

PAGE 41

T he L a s t H i e r og l yph I : W a s i t de s pe r a t e ? D i d t he ha m m e r s t r i ke t he c h i s e l l i ke t he he a r t be a t of a hum m i ngbi r d i n t he s a m e f r e nz y c hi l d r e n no w a t t a c k pr e s e nt s unde r pi ne t r e e s ? D i d s w e a t f r om t he a ut hor s br ow s e e p i nt o t he s a nds t one a s f or e he a d hi t w a l l a f t e r c om pl e t i ng t he gl yph a m om e nt of r e l i e f o f s ubm i s s i on, of r e a l i z a t i on t ha t t he c onque r or s w e r e c om i ng w i t h f i nge r s l i ke m os qui t oe s s i ngi ng f or bl ood? B ut t he w or d w as H a d t he s c ul pt or c hos e n t he r a c e f or a udi e nc e ove r t he r a c e f o r e xi s t e nc e a nd w on? I I : O r w a s i t i n s i gni f i c a nt a j ob c om m i s s i one d a nd d one ? T he a pa t hy of t he ne xt pa y da y? A f i ni s h l i ne w i t h no m e a ni ng a nd a l a s t br e a t h t ha t w a s l e s s ga s p a nd m or e s i gh of r e l i e f ? I I I : O r w or s t of a l l w a s i t a s l ow de l i be r a t e a dm i s s i on of de f e a t a s m e a ni ngl e s s a s c ov e r i ng one s e ye s i n t he pa t h of a l a va f l ow ? D i d t he s c ul pt or s e e t he s hi p s c om i n g, t he s ol di e r s m a r c hi ng a nd c a r ve a l ow l y go odbye be f or e f l e e i ng t he s c e n e ? I ns t e a d of I : c hi ppi ng t he s c e ne d e s pe r a t e : t he ha m m e r t he c hi s e l t he bur s t he a r t of a hum m i ngbi r d m i s t a ke n on a dus t y f l oor f or a m e r e pe bbl e 37

PAGE 42

S t a i ne d G l a s s W i ndow S w e e t a l m os t s i c k s w e e t a i r f or t y f i ve m i l e s pe r hour w i t h hum i d i t y s t r e a m i ng t hr ough m y ha i r A f l a s hi ng ye l l ow a nd a j us t f i ni s he d a ni ne hour s hi f t s m i l e T he w a r m a m be r l i ght of m y s t e r e o d i s pl a y s c r e e n bl i nki ng 11: 25. B l a c k t r uc k s c r e a m i ng t hr ough a r e d l i ght a n une x pe c t e d r oa d bl oc k, t e n c r um bl i ng ya r ds no c ha nc e of s t oppi ng I ya nk t he w he e l w i t h a r i ght ha nd I c a n no l onge r f e e l M y s hi ny m i dni ght l e m m i ng pl unge s he a d f i r s t i nt o t he s e a of o f f e ndi ng m e t a l a n uni m pr e s s i ve t hud a nd s m oke a nd de f l a t e d a i r ba gs T he b r ow n f og i n t he c a bi n t e a r s a t m y t hr oa t l i ke a r a bi d w ol f S i l e nc e W a t c h i s t i c ki ng 11: 27. T he c a r doo r w hi m pe r s a l i t t l e w he n I l e a n i t ope n. H a z y e ye d I f i s h a c hunk of gl a s s out of m y a r m s t i l l num b. S m oke a nd s i r e ns B ut I m t oo bus y s m i l i ng R e d i s c ove r i ng t he j oys of br e a t hi ng a nd bl e e di ng s t a r i ng a t a gl a s s c ove r e d r oa d I t s pa r kl e s l i ke a n i c e s c ul pt ur e t oo be a ut i f ul t o be a n a c c i de nt 38

PAGE 43

S c r a p I r on f o r t he S c r a pbook Y our voi c e s a gge d a l i t t l e l i ke t r e e s s uppor t i ng a f a t m a n i n a ha m m oc k. Y our e ye s c r ys t a l l i z e d, a nd t he ne w a ngl e s be c a m e t oo m uc h f or your l i ds t o s l i de ove r Y ou c oul dn t bl i nk. I n r e be l l i on t o t h i s ne w i m pe di m e nt your l ow e r l i p qui ve r e d, your uppe r l i p he l d i t s gr ound l i ke a young gi r l f i ght i ng w i t h a l l h e r m i ght not t o ha ve a n a c c i de nt T he r e w a s gl a s s on t he r oa d s t a r i ng up i nnoc e nt l y, l i ke s ha r k t e e t h on a bl a c k s a nd be a c h, t he t r e a s ur e of s om e pa s s e r by, not t he vi ol e nt r e m a i nde r of t he hung r y be a s t S om e w he r e i n t he gr a s s be s i de i t w a s a be a c he d w ha l e pe r i w i nkl e bl ue a nd pr i m e r gr a y t ur ne d on i t s s i de w i t h i t s w he e l s s t i l l s pi nni ng. H a ngi ng l i f e l e s s out of one of i t s s ha t t e r e d e ye s : a m a n s ha pe l i m p l i ke a de a d e e l ha r d t o f oc us on. A nd a l l you c oul d s pi t out of t he l ow t i de i n your m out h w a s : 39

PAGE 44

W i de E ye d A m ba s s a dor Z e r o Y ou kne l t on unc ooke d r i c e ha nds c l a s pe d l i ke your l i ps w he n ha m m e r e d i nt o a H a i l M a r y pr e s c r i be d by a m a n w ho ve nds vi s i ons w hos e s a l va t i on be gi ns w i t h t w o ve r t i c a l l i ne s t hr o ugh t he s Y ou f or got t ha t you w e r e pa r t of dus k, pa r t of s unr i s e m oonl i ght on t he w e t g r a s s t he m us i c of m i d a ut u m n w i nd, t he r e gr e t o f a r a i ndr op t ha t w he n f i na l l y on t he gr ound, l ooks ba c k up a t t he c l ouds a nd i s hom e s i c k t he pa c ke d e a r t h be ne a t h a t o m bs t one I f you w oul d r i s e you w oul d unde r s t a nd: ( W i pe t he ha r d gr a i ns a nd bl ood f r om you r kne e s R i ns e t he gui l t f r om you r s ha dow ) Y ou c a n a l w a ys s e e f ur t he r on your f e e t 40

PAGE 45

O bi t ua r y of a n A ubr e y C a us e of de a t h: T ypi c a l C or ona r y T h r om bos i s l i ke a t ypi c a l r oc k t hr ow n i n a t ypi c a l pond c a us i ng t ypi c a l r i ppl e s t he n s i nki ng t he n gone 41

PAGE 46

A D r i nk be f o r e B e dt i m e i n m e m or y of C hr i s P e a c e Y our body: a ha nd gr e na de r i pe w i t h t he a f t e r t a s t e of S out he r n C om f or t I ns i de you ve r oc ke d t o s l e e p pa r t s t ha t you ne ve r s houl d. Y our w i f e c r i e s i n a ne a r by c ha i r t or m e nt e d by t he t hought of c l os e t s a nd a l l t hos e ha nge r s m i s s i ng t he i r bl a c k c l ot hi ng 42

PAGE 47

E l e gy f o r a M a n I N e ve r M e t t o t he l a t e poe t S D a ni e l S i m ko a s t r a ns l a t e d t hr ough t he s oul of N i c hol a s S a m a r a s I ha ve s e e n t he s t or y of you r na m e c ut i nt o r oc k. Y e t you w hi s pe r t hr ough a bs e nt m oonl i ght t hr ough pa ge s you f i l l e d w i t h s i l e nc e t ha t t he r e a l s t or y i s not i n t he c hi s e l e d, or t he c hi s e l i ng, but i n t he hom e l e s s s t one t ha t us e d t o f i l l you r na m e 43

PAGE 48

G r e e nbr i e r R oa d L i t t l e l e gs l ol l yga ggi ng i n l oops pe da l s s c r a pi ng t he bot t om o f m y f e e t a nd K a t i e ke e pi ng pa c e w i t h m e l a ughi ng, pa nt i ng a nd s a yi ng: I m gonn a pa s s you T hi c k s w e a t c r a w l i ng dow n t he ba c k of your ne c k, m a t t i ng t he ha i r a l ong t he w a y. R a c i ng our t a i l s of f a r ound bl i nd c or ne r s ove r one l a ne br i dge s a nd ba c k hom e . a l m os t O ne m or e s ha r p c ur ve a nd a t r uc k a nd a s w e r ve a nd ope ni ng m y e ye s i n a di t c h your ba r e ha ndl e ba r w e dge d i n m y hi p bone m y ha nd i n s om e t hi ng s of t a nd w e t S t r a i ni ng t he s c e ne i nt o f oc us your he a d da s he d on a r oc k, m y ha nd i n . e nough t o ke e p m y m out h s hut f or a m ont h S o m a ny s t r e t c he d f a c e s s c r e a m i ng, c r yi ng, c l i ngi ng t o t he no l onge r you, w hi l e t ha t ba s t a r d ke pt dr i vi ng W hi l e t ha t ba s t a r d ke e ps dr i vi ng 44

PAGE 49

N a r r a t i ve D i s t a nc e I r a n ove r a ki t t e n a nd a s qui r r e l i t w a s c ha s i ng ye s t e r da y, s he s a i d. S uc ke d he r bot t om l i p c om pl e t e l y i nt o he r m ou t h, f oc us e d he r ga z e on he r s hoe l a c e s S he c ont i nue s I ve ne ve r f e l t s o da m n gui l t y. I w oul d ne ve r ki l l a nyt hi ng on pur pos e T os s e d he r c i ga r e t t e i nt o a ne a r by pond, t ook a bi t e ou t of a hot dog 45

PAGE 50

T w o C a r G a r a ge S he c a r e s s e s t he s pi ne of a t a t t e r e d r e d not e book l i ke a l ove r s ba c k. B ox of D r e a m s t a t t ooe d on t he c ove r i n t hi c k bl a c k m a r ke r S he f l i ps t h r ough t he pa ge s e a c h ha s onl y a s i ngl e phr a s e w r i t t e n s o c a r e f ul l y t ha t t he y s e e m e m br oi de r e d B ac k pac k t hr ough E u r ope A t t e nd m ode l i ng s c hoo l J oi n t he C I A E ar n a D oc t or at e i n ge ne t i c s B e c om e a di pl om at L e av e m y hom e t ow n. A buz z e r s ounds hi s c l ot he s a r e d r y. S he c l e a r s t he not e book o f f t he i r on i ng boa r d F r a nt i c a l l y, he r e ye s r a c e t ow a r d t he c l oc k on t he s t ove S he bi t e s he r f i s t T he f r on t door bur s t s ope n, H one y, w ha t s f or di n ne r ? 46

PAGE 51

T he B ot t om D r a w e r P a l e r t ha n f l uor e s c e nt l i ght s he di ps he r f i nge r s i n t o ol d w a t e r t ha t s de ve l opi ng a s ki n i n a bl ue va s e T he r e i s s om e t hi ng l i ke a n unde r t ow he r ha nd s l i de s i n t o t he w r i s t a nd f or a m om e nt i t s i nvi s i bl e T he n t he va s e t i ps a nd h i t s t he g r ound. S ha r pe r t ha n t he s ha t t e r e d gl a s s s he r uns he r t ongue a c r os s a n e nve l ope s e a l i ng he r bi l l s l i ke he r f a t e l i ke he r l i ps T he r e i s s om e t hi n g a bout t he s e ndi ng t ha t m a ke s a n a va l a nc he out of a qui e t s l ope a nd e ve r y t i m e t he r um bl e c om e s s he t a ke s a na p i n i t s pa t h A s f or hope s he l l ke e p i t i n t he bot t om dr a w e r t uc ke d a w a y l i ke a gun i n a nur s e r y, a s e c r e t por nogr a phy o f m ay be I c oul d s S he l l w r i t e of w a t e r f a l l ki s s e s a nd w e t ha i r on t he f a c e s of l ove r s a nd f i ght e r s a nd a nyone w ho m ove s t he n c l os e t he dr a w e r a nd s e t he r a l a r m 47

PAGE 52

C ha pt e r T hr e e : I n V i ol e nt L i ght 48

PAGE 53

I S a w Y ou W a t c h M e C r os s t he S t r e e t f r om Y our L i vi ng R oom E i ght y de gr e e s F l or i da a f t e r noon s t i l l i c e on t he w i ndow 49

PAGE 54

L ow T i de i n t he E ye of t he S t o r m H e f e d t he oc e a n a bot t l e c a p f ul l o f r a i n. H i s ha ndm a de m a p ur ge d hi s f e e t t o t r a c e t he s e a w e e d l i ni ng t he s hor e H e c l os e d one e ye t o f e e l m or e l i ke t he s uns e t be f or e t he c ol or s w e r e t or n f r om i nv i s i bl e s t a r s a nd r um s oa ke d r a i nbow s H i s f a c e l os t t he w a r w i t h t he s pr a ys of t he s e a a nd s a nd, l i ke ne w t e e t h, e a ge r t o bi t e t hr ough unpr ot e c t e d c he e ks a nd l i ps H e t r i e d t o r a i s e hi s ha nd t o s hi e l d hi s e ye but noos e s of w i nd l e f t b r ui s e s on hi s ne c k a s he s l i d a l ong a s hor e a l l s c r e a m a nd no s ong. 50

PAGE 55

S t r e ngt h R e pl i e d A pr ogr e s s i on of t hr e e not e s f i nge r e d une ve nl y, i na dve r t e nt l y, t he m i ddl e not e m ut e d. Y ou ha ve pl a ye d t hi s s ong t he s a m e w a y f or c e nt ur i e s T oni ght I s t oppe d you de ni e d you. M a de a ne w s ong t hr ough w e a kne s s t hr ough he s i t a t i on he a l e d w ha t w a s ne ve r br oke n. T he a i r c l ung t o yo ur l i ps : t a s t e l e s s hone y, a n e m pt y c up o f m i dni ght a nd c a ndl e l i ght Y ou r e a c he d f or w or ds but t he y s c ur r i e d a w a y, l i ve d ne w l i ve s i n e m pt y ha l l w a ys a nd ope n doo r s I w oul d not gr a nt s a f e pa s s a ge Y our t ongue s t um bl e d a nd f e l l l e a ke d t he poe t r y o f ha l f f or m e d t hought s um bi l i c a l U nde r de a d s t a r s I pul l e d v i c t or y j us t out of your r e a c h j us t f a r e nough t ha t your bl ood s c r e a m e d f or i t I n t ha t m om e nt m a n, c hi l d a nd s ha dow m e r ge d w i t hout m y a s s i s t a nc e a nd, i n w e a kne s s s i l e nc e t ol d t he s t or y t ha t s t r e ngt h ne ve r c oul d. 51

PAGE 56

A bs i nt he S t a t i c f r om t he T V pou r e d ont o t he f l oo r S om e one s a t I ndi a n s t yl e i n t he c or ne r buz z i ng l i ke a f l y i n a j a r T he door w a y s hr unk t oo s m a l l f o r a ny of us N o one w a s l e a vi ng s e ve nt y de gr e e s s w e a t e ve r yw he r e A gi r l l i t t he w r ong e nd of he r c i ga r e t t e a gl a s s br oke i n t he ki t c he n, l a ught e r f e l l l i ke a n a c r oba t of f a hi gh w i r e T he t oi l e t f l us he d. Y ou a s ke d w ho w a s i n t he ba t h r oom T he t oi l e t f l us he d a ga i n. T he bl i nds c l os e d, l i ght s of f s t i l l t he m oon f ound us I n t he ba c kgr ound a n a l a r m c l oc k s a ng w i t h t he c r i c ke t s 52

PAGE 57

O ne F ul l R ot a t i on Y ou f e l l a s l e e p on t he e dge of a di m e A l l t he t i m e r s w e r e s e t a nd t he c l ot he s w e r e s t i l l r i di ng s pi n c yc l e a T V l e f t on. A n ol d book w i t h a f ur r o w l e f t by a bur ni ng c i ga r T he c a t pa c e d s i l e nt l y, a nd t he m or ni ng c r a w l e d pa s s e d you. I t s c a r c a s s w i l l s i ng you H a ppy B i r t hda y. 53

PAGE 58

S oot hs a ye r I dr e a m t of s i l ve r r a i n s hr e ddi ng t he c l ot he s of a be gga r s ur r ounde d by f ou r l a r ge m os s y s t one s H i s ga z e r e f r a c t e d of f t he m i r r o r e d r a i nd r ops s pi l l e d c ol or a c r os s t he m uddy r oa d. H e w hi s pe r e d a m a nt r a t ha t s pun i n t he w i nd e c hoi ng of f t he da r ke ni ng s ky: N o s e c r e t i s s af e w i t h m e I t w a s t he m ys t i c hone s t y, t he t ot a l di s r e ga r d f or t he pl e a s a nt r i e s of de c e pt i on t ha t w oke m e t ha t t ol d m e i t w a s a d r e a m 54

PAGE 59

A c qui r i ng M yt hol ogy A r e d ha ndl e d ba l l pe e n ha m m e r l e a ns a ga i ns t a f a ux w ood ba s e boa r d s ur r ounde d by gl a s s s ha r ds a nd a s h gr e y c a r pe t ba s ks i n t he c ha t t e r of m i d a f t e r noon t e l e vi s i on, a dj us t s t o t he c ha nge i n t e m pe r a t u r e r e m i ni s c e s a bout i t s m ode of e nt r y, be c om e s t he ham m e r t hat c am e t hr ough t he w i ndo w not j us t t he ham m e r gr a dua t e s f r om t ool t o t a l e 55

PAGE 60

L e a ve t he P e a r l i n t he O ys t e r Y ou a t e a pl a t e o f f o r t une c ooki e s l e f t t he pa pe r i ns i de T he w e t of w oul d be ki s s e s bl ur r i ng b l ue w or ds on w hi t e A pi l e of c e l l opha ne i n you r l a p w r i nkl i ng t he e ve ni ng, i m i t a t i ng w i nd bl ow n N ove m be r 56

PAGE 61

T r a i n o f O ught s T hi s a t m os phe r e i s c r i ppl e d T he s m oke c a n ba r e l y c r a w l a w a y. T he y r e c l i m b i ng s ha t t e r e d ba r s t ool s but t he y w on t pe a k. T he r e s no pi nna c l e t o r e a c h. T he w om e n a r e t i r e d o f f l a unt i ng, t he m e n a r e t i r e d o f hi t t i ng, t he c l oc k i s t i r e d of t i c ki ng A nd t he t r ut h i s i nt e r m i t t e nt W e a r e l one l y a nd c r ow de d. O ur s ol i t ude i s s t r i ppi ng P ul l i ng out i t s ga r t e r but w e r e not t i ppi ng, not t oni ght I l ook a t t he guy ne xt t o m e H e s dr i e d up, c r a c ke d a nd f r a ye d. I l i ght a m a t c h a nd t he n he s a s he s A nd I c a n t r e c a l l hi s f a c e W e r e t oo da m n t i r e d f or da nc i ng a nd w e r e t oo da m n c ol d t o s m i l e W e l os t our i nnoc e nc e on T V s c r e e ns ke pt our i de nt i t i e s i n f i l e s s a i d our I do s a nd don t s i nt o m i c r ophone s t o w or r i e d w i t he r e d e a r s ga ve up our hope s a nd j oys a nd ha ppi ne s s but ke pt a t i ght g r i p on our f e a r s T he y l a nde d us a l l he r e r i di ng t he t r a i n o f ought s 57

PAGE 62

M i dni ght i n t he Q ua r t e r A br onz e s t a t ue of a w om a n s i t t i ng r i ve r s i de of D e c a t ur a n a l l e y be hi nd a n ope n a i r c of f e e s hop on t he e dge of a f ount a i n a br onz e s t a t ue of a w om a n, s i t t i ng i t f a c e d us you a s ke d f or a pi c t ur e o f you r s e l f be s i de i t on t he e dge of a f ount a i n you f e l t a s e ns e of dr e a d f r om t he s t a t ue you c oul dn t m ove I t ook t he pi c t ur e you f e l t a s e ns e of dr e a d I gr a bbe d you r ha nd pul l e d you f r om t he f ount a i n a n a l l e y be hi nd a n ope n a i r c of f e e s hop i n t he pi c t ur e t he s t a t ue s he a d w a s t ur ne d t ow a r d you you f e l t a s e ns e of dr e a d f r om t he s t a t ue i t w a s n t l ooki ng a t you but t hr ough you t he r e w a s no m e na c e i n i t s f a c e onl y f e a r you f e l t a s e ns e of dr e a d f r om t he s t a t ue s om e t hi ng w a s c om i ng, w e w e r e l e a vi ng, i t ha d no w he r e t o go 58

PAGE 63

G ui de d by V oi c e s f or R obe r t P ol l a r d T o s e e t hr ough t he s ki n o f t he e ye gi ve bi r t h t o your s e l f i n s yr upy l i ght l e a v e t h e c hi l d ki c ki ng on t he c ha ngi ng r oom f l oor T o a r r i ve a t t he e nt r a nc e w i t h a c a nne d s e ns e of e xi t a nd a f i f t h of s om e t hi ng t ha t bur ns I t m a y t a s t e l i ke t om or r ow but t he t ongue w i l l s e nd ye s t e r da y. T o a s h i n t he bot t l e t he n t a ke a s i p, bi t e t he l i p l i c k t he bl ood f i nd t he pow de r i n t he pa i n, c oc k t he j a w l e t t he t e e t h be c om e a t r i gge r T o put t he m ot i on ont o pa pe r s t a nd up s i ngi ng, s i t dow n on t he m e l ody of ol d phone s a nd bus t e d a m pl i f i e r s T o l e t t he br oke n gui t a r s t r i ng a r t i c ul a t e a n a pol og y on a dus t y f a c e pl a t e w hi l e t he f ut u r e s l i de s i nt o p r e s e nt t e ns e t he ki ng of r e ne ga de e c hoe s : s ound t ha t s ki ns vi s i on a l i ve T o s w a l l ow t he f r e s hl y pe e l e d m a nt r a a nd s i ng t o ne w bor n de w t he s ke l e t on of a c l oud t ha t ne ve r got t o be r a i n. 59

PAGE 64

T he C of f e e R e m a i ns A nonym ous I n t he s a m e br e a t h t ha t he he a r d you ye l l R um m y, you s a w t he di r t y f a c e of vi c t or y on a c hi ppe d di ne r t a bl e T he w e t s t r a w w r a ppe r c om pa c t e d, t he n e xpa nde d by a n a r t i f i c i a l r a i nd r op, l ooke d gui l t y l i ke i t c oul d be b l a m e d f o r i t s s ha pe T he m onke y di s h t i ppe d s pi l l i ng hone y m us t a r d l i ke i t s t h r oa t ha d be e n s l i t T he m e nu a pt l y w a t e r e d r oot e d t o t he t a bl e H i s ha nd s w oopi ng dow n on t he de c k t he n r e t u r ni ng t o t he f a l c one r s pe r c h. Y our e ye l i d t he s t or y o f a bl i nk t he one m om e nt of bl a c kne s s i n a s t or m of pl a yi ng c a r ds 60

PAGE 65

T he O ne L e a ni ng O ve r a B ook I ns pi r e d by S D a ni e l S i m ko I t s t he w a y s om e body r i ps a bl a nk pa ge a s i f i t ha d not hi ng t o s a y, a s i f l ungs a nd ha nds a nd e ye s w e r e a l l t ha t c oul d t e l l a s t or y. I t s t he w a y t he pa pe r r i ps ba c k, pus hi ng i t s s c a r i nt o t he m i nd of t he m u r de r e r t e a c hi ng i m pe r f e c t i on by e xa m pl e f or c i ng i t s s t or y t hr ough t he ho l e i n t he w h ol e I t s t he w a y t he m e s s a ge i s di ge s t e d a nd e xc r e t e d a nd i gnor e d. I t s t he w a y t he c ove r o f t he not e book hi de s t he vi ol e nc e 61

PAGE 66

I W a t c he d Y ou f r om t he D oor w a y O n t he br i nk of s om e t hi ng i m por t a nt t he l i ps t i c k i s knoc ke d of f t he c o unt e r t op. I t l e a ve s a l ong s t a i n on t he va ni t y, a s hor t one on t he c a r pe t 62

PAGE 67

T w o Y e a r s A go T hi s M or ni ng Y ou w e r e a l w a ys f e e di ng m e g l a s s a ppl e s a nd s pe a ki ng i n t ongue s ki s s i ng pl a c e s I di dn t ha ve na m e s f or r unni n g your f i nge r s ove r m e t r a c i ng m e l i ke a c ha l k l i ne on t he s t r e e t Y ou d pr e s s your s i l e nc e a ga i ns t m e l e t your t oe s br us h t he bot t o m of m y f e e t w r i t e poe m s on m y c he s t w i t h you r c he e k. W e d c r e e p l i ke s of t s ha dow s t ow a r d da w n. B ut w he n da y f i na l l y c a m e w e w e r e s unf l ow e r s i n vi o l e nt l i ght c ha s i ng di f f e r e nt s uns 63

PAGE 68

P a l i m ps e s t Y ou l a y na ke d i n gr i t t y l i ght s pi l l e d t hr ough a n ol d l a m ps ha de O n t he r i c h pa r c hm e nt of your s ki n, I w a t c h t he m r i s e a ga i n t he ghos t s of l e t t e r s be l ow t he l i ne s of t he s t or y you ve a l l ow e d m e t o s e e T oni ght t he i r pha nt om br ow n i s di s t i nc t e nough f o r m e t o r e a d t hr ough t he w a x s e a l ve r m i l l i on o f t he ne w you. T he y a r e ol d l e t t e r s i nc h hi gh, e a c h di s t i nc t f r o m t he ne xt T he y t e l l t he s t or y o f t h e s ky: how i t m a de l ove t o t he s e a a nd t he l a nd w a s bor n i n t he f r e s h f oa m A nd how you be l i e ve d t he s t a r s s a ng t o you a nd t he f l i c ke r of e ve r y f l a m e he l d t he s e c r e t of t he s un. B ut t he ne w l e t t e r s a r e s upe r i m pos e d on t he s e gho s t s t he y s ha r e t he i r t a l e a s w e l l l oude r r e dde r r ounde r H ow you w e r e s uc h a n e xt r a va ga nt a nd e xpe ns i ve w r i t i ng s ur f a c e i m pos s i bl e t o r e pl a c e s o w he n t he ne w m e n c a m e a nd t a ught you a bout gui l t a nd c onf e s s i on, you c oul d not a f f or d ne w s ki n. S o you s c r a pe d t he o l d you a w a y, a n d i n a ne w s c r i pt f ul l of l i ga t ur e s you r e w r ot e you r s e l f t ol d your f r i e nds t o c a l l you C a r ol i ne your ol d na m e ha d, unt i l now e l ude d m e B ut he r e i n a t hi r t y dol l a r m ot e l r oom a t hous a nd m i l e s f r om hom e I s e e you a l l of you. Y ou pul l t he c ove r s ove r you r f l e s h, bl us hi ng be c a us e I m s t a r i ng, but i t s t oo l a t e t he w hi s pe r s of your hi s t or i e s ha ve r e a c he d m y e a r s : 64

PAGE 69

you a r e t w o t e xt s t w o s t or i e s a nd t he y w i l l no t be r e c onc i l e d. 65

PAGE 70

M e di t a t i on i n F r a gm e nt s A w i ndow f r a m e w i t h gl a s s i n o nl y one c o r ne r T he l a s t t hr e e l e t t e r s of a ny a l pha be t T he gr e e n ghos t o f a ye l l ow s un t ha t hi de s be hi nd e ye l i ds T hi s i s hom e : t he c l i c k of t e e t h on a pe n a f t e r a n i de a ha s s t r uc k l i ke a de a t h a dde r t he m om e nt be f o r e t he v e nom s e f f e c t s s l i t he r t o t h e s ur f a c e 66

PAGE 71

S m oke S i gna l s t o a P oe t ( a F r i e nd) Y our w or ds c om e l i ke F l o r i da he a t a c r os s a l ong f l a t r oa d. A t r i c k l i ght pl a ys on i t s e l f Y ou t a ke bi ogr a phy a w a y f r om t he r i ght a ngl e s of pr o s e f ol d i t ove r poe t r y s ge nt l e c u r vi ng e dge W ha t i s t r ut h bu t a l a c k of s ha r p c or ne r s a c ol l e c t i on of s of t t ur ns t ha t f o r c e a l l e ye s i nw a r d ? Y ou ha ve be c a m e f l ue nt i n t he w hi s pe r s of t hos e c ur ve s t he l a ngua ge of c i r c l e s I n t he vi c t i m s of p r e m a t ur e bu r i a l i n t he pa s s i ng of a br ot he r m or e br ot he r t ha n ge ne s or t he f r ui t of a f a m i l y t r e e he r e you f i nd t he s a m e t a ngi bl e m ys t e r i e s t ha t l i ne d your f a t he r s ha nds H e r e you l e a ve t he i r s t or y f o r us t o t ur n t o, t he n t ur n a w a y ba c k t o t he m i r r or s w e s o c a r e f ul l y c e nt e r on our ow n e m pt y w a l l s 67

PAGE 72

I nc i de nt a l M us i c A C ol l a ge of P oe t i c s 1 Y ou m us t e a t t he a ppl e of your e ye 2 S om e w he r e t he r e i s a m a n w i t h no t ongue s i ngi ng t he onl y s ong t ha t w i l l e ve r br e a k your he a r t 3 S ha pe i s t he onl y t hi ng ke e pi ng you f r om be i ng t he oc e a n, a nd t he onl y t h i ng ke e pi ng t he oc e a n f r o m be i ng y ou. 4 B e a ut y i s t he t r a ns l a t i on f r om one m out h t o a not he r di s e m bodi e d ki s s e s 5 Y ou m us t bur n your s e l f a l i ve but not r i s e a ga i n l i ke a phoe ni x. Y ou m us t l e t t he a s he s s pe a k f or t he m s e l ve s 6 L us t a f t e r t he w or ds o f ot he r s un t i l you r he a r t pum ps onl y i nk, t he n c r e a t e w or ds t o r e c i pr oc a t e t ha t pa i n. 7 T r us t i s t he one t hi ng a poe t c a n ne ve r gi ve a pe n. 8 B e c onc e r ne d w i t h t he uni ve r s e o f m e a ni ng a nd i m pl i c a t i on i n e ve r y w r y gl a nc e i n e ve r y s m i l e t ha t s om e one c onc e i ve s t he n de c i de s a ga i ns t 68

PAGE 73

9 K now t he t hr e e e s s e nt i a l l i ne s i n e ve r y poe m ( t he y m a y ove r l a p) : t he f i r s t l i ne t he l a s t l i ne a nd t he f a ul t l i ne 10 M a pm a ke r s a r e your c l e r gy. S t r i ve t o be or da i ne d 11 R e l i gi on e xi s t s i n t he s pa c e be t w e e n t hi nki ng a nd a c t i ng, but ne i t he r a r e r e qui r e d P oe t r y e xi s t s i n t he s a m e s pa c e but r e qui r e s bot h 12 P oke your pe n i nt o t he e ye of t he pa ge t he n w onde r w hy i t i s c r y i ng. 13 T he r e i s a g i r l l ooki ng ba c k a t you f r om one hundr e d ye a r s a w a y your bi ogr a phe r S he w i l l w r i t e your l i f e m or e a c c ur a t e l y t ha n you l i ve d i t 14 G uns hot B l oody hol e E ve r yone w i l l a s s um e bul l e t H ow do you i m pl y s om e t hi ng di f f e r e nt ? T hi s i s w he r e t he poe t s w or k l i e s : w he r e m us e s be c om e de m ons 69

PAGE 74

T w i l i ght S e r e na de A c a r c r a s h w i t h no s ur vi vor s a c r os s t he s t r e e t f r o m a n i c e c r e a m t r uc k, t ha t s how t he da y e nds T he t r uc k s ps yc hot i c m us i c box s i ngs t o c hi l dr e n, f r oz e n l i ke t he i r t r e a t s T he s un ha ngs i t s e l f on a w hi t e t hr e a d l e f t i n t he s ky by a j e t t ha t w a s r a c i ng t o m e e t a de a dl i ne A n e m pt y gl a s s ha m m e r e d i nt o a c ount e r a nd a be l c h l i ke a t r um pe t r e ve r i e t ha t s how t he da y e nds A ba r doo r s hut s l i ke a he a vy e ye l i d. S l e e p be c om e s s om e t hi ng l i qui d, s om e t i m e s f i nds t he f l oor T he da y e nds i n f r ont of a t i m e c l oc k. O ne ha nd f i r m l y gr a s ps a m a ni l a t i c ke t t o f r e e dom t he ot he r r uns dow n t om o r r ow s s c he dul e T he m a c hi ne bi t e s t he c a r d. C a r ke ys e m e r ge f r om a poc ke t T he l a s t di nne r di s h i s dr oppe d i nt o ho t w a t e r a n d s uds s w a l l ow i t l i ke a s na ke s w a l l ow s a r a t T ha t s how t he da y e nds : w he n t he l a s t c hor e c a n w a i t f or t om o r r ow w he n be d i s t he onl y pr e s s i ng m a t t e r w he n t he a l a r m i s a l r e a dy s e t N a ke d on t he f l oo r w i t h your ha nds ove r you r e ye s t ha t s how t he da y e nds Y ou s hi ve r but f e a r c l ot he s ; ye a r n t o s e e t he s uns e t but f e a r t h e da r k; s i ng H a ppy B i r t hda y t o t oda y s box on t he c a l e nda r A l l a l one you s hi ne w hi t e l i ke t he m oon on your b l a c k c a r pe t T he da y e nds w i t h t he ba c k of a s hove l pa t t i ng do w n t he l oo s e s oi l of a ne w l y f i l l e d gr a ve T r e e s c r e a k l i ke ol d f l oo r boa r ds A m ot or c y c l e s pe e ds by on a r oa d t oo f a r a w a y t o s e e W i t h t he w e i ght o f t he ghos t s I ga t he r e d t ha t s ho w t he da y e nds W hi s pe r s f r om pi c t ur e unt a ke n: t he w a y t he i r t oe s c ur l e d, t he w a y t he i r n os t r i l s f l a r e d w he n t he y c r i e d, how s of t t he i r c he e ks w e r e on m y c he s t I n t he m i ddl e of a bl i nk t ha t s how t he da y e nds 70

PAGE 75

G ui de d M e di t a t i on O n t he f a r s i de of t he w oods t he da r kne s s i s s o t hi c k t ha t you c a n t e ve n he a r s o t hi c k t ha t you c a n t r e m e m be r how t o he a r I am unnam abl e y e t y ou hav e nam e d y our s e l f af t e r m e D e c l ar e y our s e l f c om m a nds t he da r kne s s i n w or ds w i t hout s ound t ha t c a r ve t he m s e l ve s pi t c h bl a c k, i nt o t he i ns i de o f your e ye l i ds Y ou pa r t you r l i ps a nd s e nd ba c k s ound t ha t w i l l ne ve r r e a c h your ow n e a r s : M y nam e i s . Y ou f r e e z e N ot hi ng c om e s A f t e r a l ong i c y s i l e nc e t he da r k r e s ponds : Y ou hav e done w e l l and ar e w e l c om e he r e 71

PAGE 76

W ha t W a s L e f t N i ght l oc ke d you i nt o your be dr oom w i t h a ba t t e r e d c ot t w o w i c ke r c ha i r s a nd a pe nc i l gr e y c a r d t a bl e Y ou s a t s hi f t i ng your w e i ght f r om one s i de t o t he ot he r f l i ppi ng a c oi n you r e t r i e ve d f r om a w e l l dr i nki ng a s he s f r om f a l l i ng s t a r s 72


xml version 1.0 encoding UTF-8 standalone no
record xmlns http:www.loc.govMARC21slim xmlns:xsi http:www.w3.org2001XMLSchema-instance xsi:schemaLocation http:www.loc.govstandardsmarcxmlschemaMARC21slim.xsd
leader nam Ka
controlfield tag 001 001789653
003 fts
005 20070606105936.0
006 m||||e|||d||||||||
007 cr mnu|||uuuuu
008 070606s2006 flu sbm 000 1 eng d
datafield ind1 8 ind2 024
subfield code a E14-SFE0001463
040
FHM
c FHM
035
(OCoLC)138359359
049
FHMM
090
PR83 (ONLINE)
1 100
Nieves, John A.
0 245
Ashes from falling stars
h [electronic resource] /
by John A. Nieves.
260
[Tampa, Fla] :
b University of South Florida,
2006.
3 520
ABSTRACT: This thesis is a book length collection of poetry---all original and by the author. The book has three chapters, each with a different mode of expressing the work's overall theme: the remnants of unfulfilled wishes. The first chapter deals with ordinary or mundane manifestations of the theme. The second chapter covers extraordinary, but still feasible, variations on the theme. The final chapter deals with subconscious versions of these unfulfilled wishes. It is far more surreal than the other two chapters and exists in a sort of dream-reality. The poetry included in this work is all free verse. There are narrative and lyric poems present, along with other experimental modes of poetry. Even though plot threads run through some individual poems, the overall collection shares only thematic unity. The work, as the title implies, seeks to call attention the fragmentation of dead dreams after hope has burned away. In a sense then, this collection could be seen as a post-modern work. The poems are arranged within the chapters to either create groupings around mini-themes, or to create sharp contrast. The order represented in this collection is an attempt to maximize impact. The cast of characters in this collection of poems is meant to be representative of the characters present in city life. There are drunks and prostitutes, mothers and fathers, lovers and ex-lovers, husbands and wives, sisters and brothers, schoolchildren, writers, grandparents, lawyers, politicians, photographers, gamblers and even corpses. These characters populate a world where unanswered wishes are as legitimate as minutes and hours as instruments to gauge the passing of lives---a poetic rendering of Earth at the beginning of the twenty-first century.
502
Thesis (M.A.)--University of South Florida, 2006.
504
Includes bibliographical references.
516
Text (Electronic thesis) in PDF format.
538
System requirements: World Wide Web browser and PDF reader.
Mode of access: World Wide Web.
500
Title from PDF of title page.
Document formatted into pages; contains 72 pages.
590
Adviser: Nicholas Samaras, Ph.D.
653
Poetry.
Free verse.
Narrative.
Lyric.
Post-modern.
690
Dissertations, Academic
z USF
x English
Masters.
773
t USF Electronic Theses and Dissertations.
4 856
u http://digital.lib.usf.edu/?e14.1463